Oh! The ending notes! So daunting! Well, hopefully I can keep the stamina to continue this into my life of Littleton. How do I sum up the events of the last month or so of Filipino living? You know what's so funny is that when it's not you the time seems like it goes so fast, but when it is you, it feels like an eternity. Well, here are at least some of the things that happened my last bit:

1. Miranda came! We got a new intern who was a

perfect addition and I said

it was even as though we were all sisters with our ages going from 24 to 18 stair-steppi

ng 2 years between each of us. And sometimes we all felt like Jeri's little ducklings when we

were all together. Miranda had been learning midwifery for seven months before she came to our Shiphrah and had been in the Filipino culture the same amount of time, which was really nice because she was so helpful right off the bat since she was bringing pre-acquired skills with her. She even showed us some new fun things we had

n't no

ticed before like buko juice sold on the streets

and massage salad made from k

amoti tops, kangkon, olive oil, calamansi juice, and peanuts!mmm. And the movies she brought worked as entertainment for many an evening at home. We all l

oved having Miranda!

2. I worked through some thoughts about midwifery and my future in the field. I realized that the core mission

of Shiphrah was the empowerment of

the women and to give hospitality to the families- true hospitality. Midwifery has been simply a tool to aid in these core purposes. One nig

ht

right before Miranda came (which is sad because she heard about it constan

tly) we heard a man named Gordon Smith talk at the church I atten

ded with Jeri and Sara. He talked about God's purpose for our lives and basically said that our passions should be considered when considering our future because we are not given those passions without reason. He asked the question of what makes us an

gry to help us find out what our passions ar

e. Through all of this and the time that followed I realized how much of a transitional and growing stage of my life I am in. I'm not meant to know exactly what I think about everything right now. I'm meant to listen and to learn. I don't know what my core passions are. So, I am leery to

decide my future plans regarding midwifery and though opening a community supported birthing home in downtown Denver is attractive to me I

don't want to settle on anything until I find my core passions that that might be the foundation for what ever I do. I realized that I don't wa

nt to be a midwife just to pay the bills and prove to my relatives that I did something with my life. I need something far more substantial than that. I need a reason to care for these women and thier fami

lies and I know that through life-experiences I'll realize my true passions.

3. Marli, Kim and all the midwives took a lovely trip to the beach, while Jeri, Deborah, Miranda, Becky, new friends of ours, Naomie an

d Red, and I stayed at the birthing home to Paanakan-sit. We sat around, got to know Red and Naomie who run a couple houses for women who need homes, ate Deborah's delicious salad, and took care of any women who wondered i

n. We had two labors, which ended in two transports. Becky's husband brought their project

or screen, spaghetti, and desert, and we had a movie night! It was a fun time.

4. I got some la

st-bit-of-time-in-the-Philippines list done, which

incl

uded, visiting Red and Naomie's homes for mothers, visiting the convent (I'd never been to a convent before) where we got a special tour, learned suturing on chicken breasts, acquired basic I.V. training, learned injections, ate a

last home-made tortilla dinner, which Sara p

lanned just for me because of how much I love that meal, played soccer with the neighborhood boys, hung out with Hope and Leah one last time,

baked cookies with Kim

at her cousin's house,

went to SM TayT

ay mall on a jeepney on one of the only rainy nights there were in the dry season, and then proceded

to dance and scream in t

he rain the whole way u

p the hill, enjoyed last prenatals, lead the prenatal exercises, and had a graduation/ thank you to the midwives ceremony.

5. For our graduation ceremony we had a list of things that the midwives told us we couldn't graduate without doing. We couldn't graduate unless we

learned the song Bahay Kubo, which lists all the

vegetables, so:

Kim and I sang let's just say our own version of the song and threw in as many veggies we knew.

We had to handwash o

ur own clothes, which we had finally gotten the hang of and been doing for a while. And eat balut. The following video may be traumatizing and not appropriate for younger, weaker-stomached people. You ask us to eat a fertalized duck still in the egg with feathers on it. We eat a fertalized duck still in egg with feathers on it. Look up "Kim and Lauren's Encounter with Balut in the Philippines" on youtube.com

Yes that was the worst thing I've ever been through. No nothing has ever been worse. No, don't try this. Ever. Anyways, the rest of the ceremony included a watermelon acting as a baby bathing contest, inactments by all the students of funny even

ts that had happened at the Paanakan including the burial of a doppler accidental

ly in with the placenta. And graduation certificates that were signed by all the midwives -so precious.

6. One of the last births I was involved in I was actually not catching. No, I was in, "the best place in the world," as Jeri calls it. I was sitting behind the woman supporting her while she was pushing on the birthing stool. In this place you can feel all this immense strength the woman is giving and you can be there for her to lean back on and rest between contractions and you can see everything she can see. Her husband was at work or something. Kim was catching the baby and Miranda was recording. It was such an awesome feeling of being a team with these wonderful women as we helped this strong woman give birth. It just felt s

o right. One funny moment during the birth was when almost simultaneously we noticed a cock roach that was slinking around the birthing bed and all over the room. I said to Miranda if it touched me she had to KILL it! We were trying so hard to not alarm the mother and so all of this was conveyed in whispers and facial expressions. The little terrorist disappeared eventually and was soon forgotten. After the birth, since the mother didn't have much for her baby, I ran down to my room and retrieved a package sent by my mother holding two quilts a friend of hers had made for families without much. I asked the mom, which one she liked and explained who had made them and that it was a special gift for her. She was so happy and I heard Ate Grace saying how nice it was for Lauren's friends to send such a special gift.

7. Last night we went to Jeri and Sara's for a dinner of pizza! We all ordered the yummy stuff, shared our balut video(afterwards as to not upset anyone's appetite), and said goodbye to the Gustafsons, and began a girls all-nighter party! We opened a bottle of wine, watched Leverage shows, which has been a tradition of Sara's and mine, watched the "Delivery" episode of "The Office", did henna, had a squatting competition, and generally partied! Darren came to pick me up and as I sat in the front seat and waved goodbye I was overwhelmed at having 5 women I loved so much standing there and knowing I was leaving them-though not forever. It was a powerful feeling.

8. In the airport I proceeded to continue henna on myself. I wrote "Miles Ahead" on my ankle which is from a Myles Davis album-the last thing I listened to in the car on the way to the airport. Now I'm just seeing what will come my way in the miles ahead.

Farewell Philippine adventure. Hello the rest of my life.